Live like you were dying

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2005-07-31T15:06:00.000+08:00

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"Birthday party a.k.a. Brudders Gathering"

2005-05-15T09:41:00.000+08:00

morning!!! just woke up sia...had a slight hangover. Fark! Went to his fren's son bday party at Admiralty. Stayed there till 11plus.... met his bestest fren, Radin & wifey. They're cool ppl. Funny & candid. No pressure felt when u're wif em. Hope they find me alright. They did talked abt sm of their frens wife/gf. felt kinda weird hearing em gossip. Guys leh...hello!! Hope they didnt gossip bout me much though. just crossed my finger tt they're cool wif me. :p Yest 4 a very3 long time i felt reli comfortable wif Isaac. After so much quarellin & thrashy stuff spoken all these while, yest i reli completely trusted him fully for the 1st time. ;) Amazing huh?? Maybe cos his best fren was der... i think i can trust him to take care & remind Isaac abt his status...hehe...hopefully! They had drinks yest... i only tried Jim Beam wif coke...like eeeww.....too strong for me... but aft a while i was alright i guess. High for a while on it but managed to shake myself out of it. Think they had Chivas Regal aft i left...hehe..dunno y they ooohhh & aaahhh abt it. is it tt nice?? *ponder ponder* nvm....wats yest is yest. today's a new day. Brand new me....woohooo. Felt kinda relieved aft i met his best frens...cool. dunno y..hehe. ciaoz.

Dilemma

2005-05-14T11:31:00.000+08:00

i just broke up wif Flic....sigh....cos i dun think he deserve to be timed...the one tt deserves it is isaac....the mother fucking asshole... actually i kinda pity flic....cos he was so enthusiastic when we got together....but the bitch side of me broke his heart...but oh well, maybe now i'll try to pursue him back...see how...if he wants it then ok..if not den too bad for me....who ask me to let go of him in the 1st place? in e return to get tt piece of thrash only....fuck u isaac...hope u choke n die....poor baby flic (he likes green...hehe)...i like u so...but i'm tied down by some issues....too harsh for reality huh?? fark fark fark....

I'm so proud of ma'self.... ;)

2005-05-10T22:47:00.000+08:00

isaac
yeah yeah.... i'm finally able to keep it cool durin one of our fights today... the feeling is best..syiok....for e 1st time, i feel like i'm in control. Makin him cum to me and lettin me pet him on his back while askin " Baby, I' m sorry...forgive me k?" Hehe.... cool or wat? Y the hell am i makin a big fuss of tis? Cos b4 tis, I've tis BIG alter EGO tt will not stoop tt far to console a person...but today i managed to do it and have him cry on my shoulder.... Yikes.... the world's upside down baby...yeah....it reli is.... despite e quarrel we had earlier, i still appreciate him....I really do.... hey....wats tat smirk for??!!
yan
my new born baby....nt tt kinda baby, my new toy....hehe....i mean a new partner... he's alrite... just mushy2....not yet matured but he's cool alrite...way cool then isaac...cos he doesnt mind me havin guy frens. i dun mind him havin gal frens cos i noe his head is full of me...well, tts wat i hope it is....the way he says I love you...his muacks over e fone...ooohhh....dammit....y didnt i met him earlier? maybe just tt he's still a bit unstable, NS mah.....wat to do... sigh...
dilemma
now i dunno wat to do...my plan is now to still kip bof... for the time bein...eventually one will have to go... still not sure who...haven't make evaluation yet... if e old one goes, i'd sure miss him like hell cos we've been thru thick n thin to cum tis far....if e young one goes, i hope he doesnt hate me... still wanna be frens wif him though no romance involved.... wateva e outcome is, GOD, pls guide me to the rite path....

9 month anniversay + 2nd day of a "new relationship"

2005-05-09T22:15:00.000+08:00

Finally....a hectic almost-did-not-workout relationship of 9 months....sigh... did manage to salvage it lah after hearing his reasonings....n i tot hey, he's rite u noe...nt all guys tt u met on e net r gd... its normal to hear ppl say cheap woman tis, cheap woman tt. But neva cheap man or watnot. Cos womans' pride is impt....so no point if i did went out wif a guy n be stead wif him fer a day onli to spite him...cos in e end, who'll lose out? me! But of cos tts just a makeup story lah. haha... the real stori is i'm beginning to have infatuation wif tis guy...he's mine now...haha... got together yest.... 08/05/05. yikes....my other serious rltnshp is 09/08/04... just imagine.... havin 2 anniversary, one after another....tsk tsk...sinful sinful....but hopefuli i noe when to stop la so tt i won't hurt either one of them..... (ya like real). But i really love both of 'em. Why can't i have the best of bof worlds!!???!! Anyway, life is once. So i'll do just wat i want for now....consequences later then think okay..??? Nites y'all.

2005-05-08T09:49:00.000+08:00

heya...today's Sunday...its the day... a decision making event later at 11am...haha...y? cos I'm meeting Yan. Dunno if i'm makin a right decision...by accepting him. I mean we live once, so heck. Do what i want la....i noe by doin tis i'll be hurting e present one tt i already have. But he has hurt me more then once already. So i guess its payback time? But i'm not all tt bad. I'll still be fair & square to bof of em. Hopefully. *cross my lil' finggy* Hmm.... thinkin abt tis just makes my tummy runs wif butterfly... just pray hard tt they'll never ever meet each other EVER!!

Another prob i have was tis issue wif the 2 farking bitches tt i used to call my gd frens...damm it. How cld they think tt i'd betrayed their frenship for a guy? A guy tt i'm not even interested in. Eewww....yucks! Look, if tt guys e one itchin up to msg me, am i wrong to just reply back a simple hello n hi so i wont sound rude?? HELLO....What the fuck man! These two bitches - Grace Lum & Suhaila- actually they dun fit e title bitches cos they've ntg on them....they're just goody-twoshoes who thinks tt tis world is perfect for ppl like them....Are they as PERFECT AS ME IN TT FUCKED UP WAY??? Haha....Arses....waste my time trusting em.... I'd rather have more guy frens tt'll suck up to me den gal frens who'll bitch behind me... well, this is life.....

my 1st tymee.....so exciting....yeehaa...

2005-05-02T06:16:00.000+08:00

yeah.....finally..... got my blog started today..yihaa.... after so mauch ponderin where to drain all my tots, i got onto tis blog wif e help of ma f*cking idiotic sister...haha.. hmm...wat shd i start? well, maybe lets tok abt tis guy i noe... ***, whose like supernice, so clean cut tt its so hard to believe tt such a guy still exist... i mean he likes me, i like him...but the thg is, i'm already attached. how i got to noe him? he was der when i was down, givin me support n encouragin me. so i reli dunno if i'm grateful to him or wat...*sigh* i mean, he's like cute n all n he juz broke up wif his gal. nt tryin to be bitch but y e gal dump him? or issit e other way round? haha...nt my prob anyway....juz glad tt he's still holdin on to hope fer me...i'm juz honored man...haha....well tts it fer now. I'll update more later...ciaoz.